Work is Death

Work is Death is the 32nd episode in Season 7 of Beavis and Butt-Head. It is the 191st episode overall.

Plot[]

At work at Burger World. Beavis is struggling to break the frozen burger patties apart, so he tries karate chopping them directly on the grill, hurting his hand. The manager comes by and looks at it, confirming Beavis' hand is not burned, and goes on to warn them to stay out of trouble since Burger World can not afford for any more injured employees to go on workers compensation. As the two misinterpret this as "worker's constipation", he corrects them and explains to them about workers comp, which of course gives them entirely the wrong idea: Butt-Head tells Beavis they should get hurt so they could go home while getting paid.

Butt-Head starts slapping Beavis and kicking him in the stomach, face, and groin in slow motion. As Beavis is still not disabled, Butt-Head tries to finish the job by hitting him over the head with a frying pan. However, the manager returns and explains they will not get compensated for fighting, but that injuries must be the result of a work accident, which they initially think means defecating in their pants.

Butt-Head's next attempt to injure Beavis and make it look like an accident is to slam the freezer door on Beavis' arms (as he carries a container of chocolate syrup, which spills everywhere). Then he dunks him in the mop bucket, pulls his hair and instructs him to get his head struck by a car in the drive thru, all to no avail.

Meanwhile, the manager gets in an accident himself, slipping on the spilled chocolate syrup, landing forward on the hot grill, searing his hands and falling backwards into the mop bucket. Butt-Head asks him to explain how he managed to contrive the accident, which angers the manager to the point of trying to attack them before falling on his face in a final act of slapstick.

Characters[]

Music Video[]

Foo Fighters - "I'll Stick Around"
- Reused from "Date Watchers"

Transcript[]

The episode opens as we see Beavis struggling to separate the burger patties.

Beavis: Ahh, Dammit, (He places the meat on the grill and slices it with his hand, only to accidentally touch the hot grill, causing him to scream in pain) Owww.

Burger World Manager: What happened to your hand?

Butt-Head: He was playing with the meat.

Burger World Manager: What? Dammit, Beavis, there's nothing wrong with you.

Beavis: Huh? Oh yeah, I'll be damned.

Burger World Manager: Be careful in the kitchen, Burger World can not afford to pay out anymore Worker's Compensation.

Butt-Head: Uhhh, Worker's Constipation?

Beavis: Yeah, yeah, I get that all the time at work when I can't take a poop.

Burger World Manager: No, you idiot, Worker's Compensation, If you get hurt at work, the government makes me send you home and pay you money for not working, so stay out of trouble.

Butt-Head: Whoa, did you hear that, Beavis? If you like get hurt at work, we can go home and still get paid.

Beavis: Oh yeah, yeah, He should of told us that a long time ago.

Butt-Head: Yeah. (Hits Beavis)

Beavis: Ahhh, What the hell are you doing, fartknocker?

Butt-Head: Uhhh, I'm like hurting you so we can get some money.

Beavis: Oh yeah, okay, but just don't touch my nads.

Butt-Head: Uhhh, this is like gonna hurt you more than it's gonna hurt me. (He hits Beavis several times.) Dammit, this is taking too long.

Beavis: Maybe you should try kicking me.

Butt-Head: Uhhh, okay. (He kicks Beavis in the groin hard enough to knock him over and proceeds to stomp on him repeatedly) I kicked your ass.

Beavis: Yeah, thanks. So where's the money?

Butt-Head: Uhhh, I think we need to like show that manager dude that you can't work or something.

Beavis: Yeah, yeah, okay.

Mr. Graham: Hello, I've been standing here for like 15 minutes.

Beavis: May I like help you or something?

Graham: Uh, yeah. Get me some chicken fingers and some small fries, and (Beavis starts to leave) hey, hey, I'm not gonna keep waiting, you know.

Beavis: Ahhh, dammit, I can still work.

Butt-Head: Uhhh, okay. Uhhh, hold still I'm gonna finish the job.

Beavis: No, No, Ahhh.

Burger World Manager: Hey, what the hell is going on here?

Beavis: Ahhh.

Butt-Head: Uhhh, we're like trying to get some of that Worker's Constipation.

Burger World Manager: You don't get worker's comp for fighting. It has to be an accident.

Beavis: You mean we need to like poop in our pants, Poop.

Burger World Manager: No, you moron, you have to be injured by something on the job, now clean yourself up and get back to work.

Butt-Head: Uhhh, why didn't that fartknocker tell us that before?

Beavis: Yeah, yeah, really, he keeps leaving stuff out.

Butt-Head: Uhhh.

Beavis: Just doing some work here, ahhhh.

Butt-Head: Come on, Beavis, stick it in there.

Beavis: Butt-head, you said.

Butt-Head: Uh, like drive up to the window please, as fast as possible.

Butt-Head: Uh, hey Beavis, like stick your head out the window so the car will hit you.

Beavis: Oh, yeah, yeah, Ahhhh, um. Hey, how's it going?

Butt-Head: Dumbass.

Burger World Manager: What the hell is going on? (As he walks into the kitchen, he slips on the spilled chocolate syrup; he yells as he falls forwards towards the grill, then screams in pain as he burns his hands on it and steps in a mop bucket, causing him to fall onto his back)

Butt-Head: Whoa.

Beavis: Dammit, we were carved for that Worker's Constipation and this bunghole stole our idea.

Butt-Head: Can you show us how you did that?

Burger World Manager: You bastards! (He gets up and tries to attack the boys, only to slip again).