[We open to Beavis and Butt-Head watching a soap opera. Beavis is seen picking his nose.]
Nurse: Ok, comfy, Mr. Swadderton?
Mr. Swadderton: [Is seen staring at the nurses cleavage] Ummm, oh yes, I'm fine!
Butt-Head: [Starts laughing] That guy's old!
Mrs. Swadderton: You're just being nice to my rich husband so he'll put you in his will! [The nurse gasps upon hearing the accusation.]
Narrator: Tune in tomorrow for another episode of The Rich and the Horny.
[Suddenly, Beavis and Butt-Head get huge thought bubbles over their heads.]
Beavis: Hey, Butt-Head. Do we know any old guys?
Butt-Head: [He takes a moment, but comes up with...] Mr. Anderson!
Beavis: Yeah! That's cool!
[And so, the boys head over to Tom Anderson's house, and ring his doorbell.]
Butt-Head: Hey, Mr. Anderson! Are you gonna die pretty soon?
Beavis: Yeah, and leave all your money to someone?
Butt-Head: That would be cool!
Tom Anderson: Boys, every man faces death. The Lord knows I've faced it many times. I took lead at Anzio. I was napalmed in Korea. And boy, that little philly in Paris put an awful strain on my ticker, I tell ya what!
Butt-Head: [He starts laughing at the "ticker" part] On your what?
Tom Anderson: Yep, boys, I've arm-wrsetled with death all my life. But, it's been a good life, and when the grim reaper comes a-knockin', this van will stop rockin'.
Butt-Head: So, are you gonna die pretty soon?
Tom Anderson: Yep, boys. I'm afraid it's inevitable.
Butt-Head: So, like, uhh... You got any, like, chores you want us to do?
Beavis: Yeah! We won't charge you nothing. [The sound of a poodle barking is heard.]
Tom Anderson: Well, that's mighty nice of you boys! Let's see here. Hmm... [He looks down at his dog, Collette, who smells of vomit and feces] Well, you can give Collette here a bath. She ain't been feeling too well lately. She's been rolling around in her own sick.
Butt-Head: [He smells the rancid odor radiating off of her] Smells like teen spirit.
Beavis: Smells like your butt!
Butt-Head: Ok, dude. We'll be back. [They leave and take her to the local laundromat.] This is gonna be cool.
[Inside, they're staring at the sign, which reads "$1.00 PER LOAD". They start laughing.]
Butt-Head: It says "load".
Beavis: Hey, Butt-Head. These things cost money.
Butt-Head: That sucks!
Elderly Woman: Boys, would you do me a favor and watch my laundry while I go to the store?
Beavis: Ummm, are you gonna die pretty soon?
Elderly Woman: I'm sorry, son. I can't hear you. You'll have to speak up.
Butt-Head: [He speaks louder for her] Uhh, never mind! We'll watch your stuff!
[As she leaves, they start throwing her laundry all over the floor. Beavis picks up a pair of underwear.]
Beavis: Look! An old lady's panties! [He then puts Collette into the washer.]
Butt-Head: [He starts laughing] It's a poodle. Set it on "delicate".
Beavis: This is gonna be cool!
[The washer begins to wash Collette, tossing her round and round in the machine.]
Beavis & Butt-Head: [They start singing their own lyrics to Judas Priest's "Breakin' the Law"] WASHIN' THE DOG - WASHIN' THE DOG! WASHIN' THE DOG - WASHIN' THE DOG! [They look inside and start laughing again.]
Beavis: You think she's clean yet?
Butt-Head: Yeah, take her out!
[They shut off the washer and pull Collette out, who is now extremely dizzy and disoriented. She tries to stand up but can't.]
Butt-Head: Whoa! Check it out! She's stoned!
[Suddenly, as they laugh, another thought appears over their head. Seconds later, they're now inside the washer, getting bounced around. Outside the machine, customers watch in horror at what is happening.]
Butt-Head: Hey, Beavis! I just made my pants dirtier!
Beavis: Hey! Look at the window! Those people can see us!
Butt-Head: Yeah! To them, my face looks like a sock!
[Suddenly, the washer finally comes to a stop. They get out and become just as disoriented as Collette is. They start doing air guitar, then puke all over themselves, including Collette as well.]
Beavis: [He laughs.] I barfed on the dog!
Butt-Head: I barfed on you!
Beavis: That was cool!
[They start cleaning themselves off with the pair of panties they found.]
Butt-Head: Let's go. Doing chores wipes me out.
Beavis: You said "wipe"!
[They take Collette home, much to the dismay of Tom Anderson, who sees she's dirtier than before!]
Tom Anderson: She smells worse than when I gave her to you!
Beavis: I don't smell nothing!
Butt-Head: Uhh, we used a special new dog detergent. "Lemon Scented Chunks".
Tom Anderson: Well, detergent ain't enough, boys. You gotta use the good old elbow grease.
Butt-Head: We used, uhh, stomach grease.
Tom Anderson: You know, it's like the story of the two frogs who fell in a pan of boiling milk. One of 'em said "I'm done for", and he gave up and died. The other one started flappin' his little froggy arms, flappin' his arms, flappin' his arms, 'til finally, he was standing on a big chunk of cheese.
Butt-Head: Whoa! We gotta try that!
Beavis: Yeah! Got any milk?
Tom Anderson: All's I'm sayin' is you boys need to get up off your butts and work harder.
Butt-Head: Hey! It was free, ass-wipe!
Tom Anderson: That's it! Get your worthless hides off my property and don't ever come back!
Butt-Head: Uhh, ok, but, uhh... We got just one question.
Tom Anderson: GET OUT!!
Butt-Head: Uhh, can we be in your will? [Tom then slams the door in their faces.]