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Cornholio

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"I am Cornholio! I need TP for my bunghole! "
 — The Great Cornholio

"This has turned into something bigger. Cornholio's their hero. He did the most dangerous thing you can do in this place. He gave those men hope. And there's a funny thing about hope. It's contagious. And these days, well, I think we need all the hope we can get."
— Prison Warden seeing Cornholio is a good person.

The Great Cornholio is the hyperactive alter-ego of Beavis. He turns into this in many episodes upon consuming several sweets and/or stimulants. Cornholio is an iconic aspect of the series, and arguably the most popular.

Description

When Beavis consumes large quantities of sugar, caffeine and other stimulants, he will begin to exhibit symptoms of convulsions, rapidly shake his head, and gaze cross-eyed at his own fist. When a Spanish sounding word is spoken or mentioned, Beavis undergoes what appears to be a total personality change, and transforms into Cornholio. Most times, however, he instantly turns into Cornholio.

When Beavis turns into Cornholio, he will raise his forearms in a 90-degree angle next to his chest, pull his shirt over his head, and then begin to yell or scream erratically, producing a stream of gibberish and strange noises, his eyes wide.

Cornholio tends to wander aimlessly while reciting “I am Cornholio! I need TP (toilet paper) for my bunghole!” in an odd phoney Hispanic accent. Sometimes, Beavis will momentarily talk normally before resuming the persona of Cornholio. Once his Cornholio episode is over, Beavis usually has no memory of what happened.

In the guise of Cornholio, Beavis pulls off some impressive feats, such as becoming a successful beat poet, as demonstrated in "Buttniks", actually killing Butt-Head and beating him in the duo's appearance in Celebrity Deathmatch, and bringing hope for prisoners in Beavis and Butt-head Do the Universe. However, his Cornholio alter-ego still lands him in trouble, as seen in "The Great Cornholio", where he interrupts a Spanish class and gets sent to Principal McVicker's office (where he eventually apologized in his normal state), and in "Vaya Con Cornholio", when he is deported to Mexico after wrongfully being subjected to immigration detention by an agent of the INS. During his detention, the agent and his superior attempt to make sense of the gibberish that is Cornholio, going so far as to look up the definition of "bunghole." In that same episode, he claims to be from Lake Titicaca, but when asked where it was, he responded with "Nicaragua", despite the fact that Lake Titicaca lies on the border of Peru and Bolivia.

Appearances

Original run

2011 revival (Season 8)

2022 revival (Season 9-present)

Movies

Video games

  • Cornholio appears in Beavis and Butt-Head: Virtual Stupidity; he is required to open the tank so the duo can drive off in it, pick up the food from Burger World for the gang at the park, and eventually get arrested, triggering the second part of the game. He will also appear briefly if the player goes to another location after having Beavis drink from the coffee machine.
  • Cornholio appears in Beavis and Butt-Head Do U, in the Java 101 coffee shop at Highland State College, where he is needed to distract the barista so Butt-Head can steal the tip jar to help set up a scam involving Van Driessen; the player can come back and have Beavis turn into Cornholio as many times as desired (until they get to the frat party). He is also needed to complete a long jump so the duo can have their Gym sign-off; Butt-Head has to shock him so he can get going.
  • In the Beavis and Butt-Head Game Boy game, Beavis can temporarily turn into Cornholio by acquiring and drinking a cup of coffee. Doing so makes Beavis invincible for a few seconds. Butt-Head, in turn, can gain similar invincibility by finding and reading a nudie magazine.

Quotes

  • Cornholio: "I am Cornholio! You will name your baby Bungholio! Is he an albino? Holio Bungholio... will be albino... and a gringo...."
  • (Cornholio picks up a spatula) Would you like a spatula? For your bunghole?
    Cornholio101
  • (Cornholio looking at a picture of Nixon) Are you threatening me!?
  • (Stewardess mentions chicken piccata) Cornholio: "Piccata? Titicaca! I am Cornholio! I need piccata for my bunghole!"
  • Stewardess: "You'll have to wait your turn, sir."
  • Cornholio: "Are you threatening me!? My bunghole will not wait!"
  • Cornholio: "In this lobby, will there be T.P.? For my bunghole?"
  • Cornholio: "Have you seen my Bunghole? My people; we are without Bungholes..."
  • Cornholio: "Do you have T.P. for my bunghole? I would hate for my bungholio to get polio."
  • Cornholio: "I am the Great Cornholio! Would you like to see my portfolio? I have a portfolio in my bunghole, with my óleo!"
  • Cornholio: "I am the Great Cornholio! I'm a gringo!"
  • Cornholio: "I am Cornholio! (Whoa! Hm heh... that was cool) I need T.P. for my bunghole! Come out with your pants down!"
  • Cornholio: "Habla, blah blah blah blah blah, Español for my bunghole..."
  • Immigration Officer: "Hey you, habla Español?"
  • Cornholio: "Español? Es bunghole! Habla, blah habla, habla habla, habla bunghole..."
  • Cornholio: "You do not want to face the wrath of my bunghole!!"
  • Cornholio: "Run as you may! You cannot escape...the Almighty Bunghole!"
  • Cornholio: "I have no bunghole!"
  • Cornholio: "Nicaragua....aqua for my bunghole.....arriba..."
  • Cornholio: "Do not make my bunghole angry!... You have any holio?"
  • Cornholio: "The principal! He will give me TP! I would hate for my bungholio to get polio....Where I come from, we have no bunghole."
  • Cornholio: "Would you like to see my bunghole?"
  • Cornholio explaining at immigration office where he comes from: "Lake Titicaca.....Nicaragua! Aqua! For my bunghole...." (though lake Titicaca is between Peru and Bolivia as noted here.)
  • Cornholio: "Stigmatatata from Lake Titicaca!"
  • Cornholio at Immigration Officer: "You can take me, but you cannot take my bunghole.... For I have no bunghole...."
  • Cornholio: "The streets will flow with the blood of the non-believers..."
  • Cornholio: "You can take me, but you will never take my bunghole, Hm heh.... For I am the Great Cornholio Hm heh I have no bunghole, hm heh..."
  • Conholio: "I am Cornholio! You will co-operate with my bunghole!"
  • Cornholio: "There will be more bungholes after me!"
  • Cornholio: "Ahahahaha! TP! You must give me your TP!"
  • Cornholio: "Where I come from there is no TP!, My people we have but one bunghole!"
  • "I am the Great Cornholio! I come from Lake Titicaca! M-heh heh, yeah, Titicaca! Titty-kaka!"
  • "I am Cornholio! I need TP for my bunghole!"
  • "I need TP for my bunghole...bunghole!"
  • "Are you threatening me?"
  • "You will give me TP, bungholio!"
  • "Are you threatening me? My bunghole will not wait!"
  • "You do not want to face the wrath of my bunghole!"
  • "The principal! He will give me TP!"
  • "Do you have any TP? TP for my bunghole?"
  • "I am a gringo!"
  • "Trick or Treat, sonofabitch!!"
  • "I want all your 'crappucino'!"
  • "I am Cornholio! You have awakened my bunghole, and now you must pay! The streets will flow with the blood of the nonbelievers!"
  • "Come out with your pants down!"
  • "I'd hate for my bungholio to get polio!"
  • "Español? Es-bunghole!"
  • "You are a bunghole! And so am I! There will be more bungholes after me!"
  • "The bunghole! It is nothing to be ashamed of!"
  • "You must bow down to the Almighty bunghole!"
  • "You can take me, but you cannot take my bunghole! For I have no bunghole. I am the Great Cornholio!"
  • "You cannot escape the Almighty Bunghole!
  • "Aaah, rolio...rolios for my bunghole!"
  • "You cannot run from your own bunghole"
  • "I shall claim this land for my bunghole! Long live the Almighty bunghole!!"
  • "Hey! Would you like to seeeeee my bunghole?"
  • "My bunghole it goes rakakaka rakakatokotoko uuaaa!!! And then sometimes my bunghole goes raawakakakabuaa bhhhuuuaua ..."(goes on)
  • "My bunghole it goes bungo, jungo jungo jungo, rungo, ra-pa-pa-pa-pa-pa-pa!!'"
  • "Where I come from, there is no TP! My people we have but one bunghole!"
  • "Where I come from, we have no Bunghole!"
  • (singing) "Rahoolioo-ooo-ooo... rahoolio... rahoolioo-ooo...bungholio...I have no bunghole...I have no bungholiooo-ooo-ooo...I am the Great Cornholio-ooo-ooo...the almighty Bunghole...the great almighty one-and-only-bungholiooo-ooo-ooo...I have no bunghole...I got Cornholiooo-ooo, in my bunghole..! (M-heh heh, yeah, that's pretty cool!)"
  • "I have no bunghole!"
  • (singing) "Would you like to see my bunghole? I will show you my bunghole...I have no bunghole!"
  • "Would you like... a spatula? For your bunghole?"
  • "Do not make my bunghole angry! Do you have any oleo?"
  • "Have you seen the Almighty Bunghole? Lead me to the Almighty Bunghole!"
  • " I am Cornholio, I need TP for my bunghole, yeah. Hey! Would you like to see my Bunghole?"
  • "My bunghole has been without TP for many years"
  • "I need crappucino for my bunghole"
  • "Would you like to see my portfolio? I have a portfolio in my bunghole with my oleo!"
  • "I would hate for my bungholio to get polio."
  • "You must prepare meats for the Almighty Bunghole!"
  • "Aqua for my bunghole, bunghole!
  • "Nicaragua! Aqua for my bunghole!"
  • "You must feed the Almighty Bunghole!"
  • "Bunghole, Bunghole, Bunghole! The almighty Bunghole!"
  • "Ahhh...the principal, he will give me TP! I would hate for my bungholio to get polio."
  • "Is this Nicaragua?"
  • "My people have been without TP. No Man should be without TP"
  • "I am Cornholio! I am a gringo! I have no bunghole! Mmmmm-bungholio!"
  • "You will give me all your caca!"
  • "I have no bunghole! I am Bungholio!"
  • "TP! You must give me your TP!
  • "Give me your TP!"
  • "You will not be safe from the Almighty Bunghole! I am Cornholio!"
  • "Do not underestimate the power of the Almighty Bunghole!"
  • "You cannot escape the Almighty Bunghole! Run as you may, you cannot escape!"
  • "I am Cornholio, guardian of the Great Bunghole!"
  • "You must give me your candy! I need rollios for my bunghole!"
  • "Do you have candy? Do you have TP?"
  • "In this barn there will be TP and candy for my bunghole!"
  • "Are you threatening me? I don't need hall pass! I need oleo for my bunghole!"
  • "I'd hate for my holio to get polio!" "(Cop:) Me too."
  • "Is dis di lobby?"
  • "Rollios, Rollios for my bunghole."
  • "Bring me your TP! All your TP! You do not want to face the wrath of my bunghole!"
  • "Are you threatening me? My bunghole will ask the questions! Why do I not use TP for my peepee?"
  • "I am Cornholio! I have polio in my bunghole!"
  • "You will belove my bunghole, for I am the Great Cornholio! I need TP for my bunghole!"
  • "You are all bungholes! Each and every one of you!"
  • "Why does everyone wanna see my schlong?"

Sources

Protagonists: Beavis / Cornholio / Old · Butt-Head / Old

Recurring Characters: Tom Anderson · Stewart Stevenson · Todd · Burger World Manager (2022) · Mrs. Stevenson · Mr. Stevenson · Lolita and Tanqueray · Maxi-Mart Clerk

Highland High School: David Van Driessen · Daria Morgendorffer · Principal McVicker · Coach Buzzcut · Spanish Teacher · Ms. Tress · School Nurse · Kimberly · Cassandra · Earl · Martin (thin) · Mrs. Dickey · Gina · Dreama · Dean Zunker · Punk Girl · Wilbur · Martin (gifted student) · JD · Glennis · Cody · Audrey · Mrs. Ortiz · Security Guard · Gym Teacher · Tommy · "Spare Me" Girls · Amy Asskowitz · Audrey's Friend · Dick Gaylord · School Psychologist · Ms. Jenkins · Jim the Substitute · Woodshop Teacher · Ryan · Librarian · Unnamed Female Teacher (Citizen Butt-Head)

Minor Characters: Marcie Anderson · Clark Cobb · Dave · Harry Sachz · Homeless Man · Madame Blavatsky · Redneck Lady · Crazy Farmer · Billy Bob · Slade · Psycho · Principal Brown · President Bill Clinton · Concert Girls · Hamid · Sterculius, the Roman God of Feces · St. Peter · Unnamed Police Officers · Mr. Manners · Frog · Harry Buddisker · Hiro · Mistress Cora Anthrax · Biker Lady · Fork Injury Guy · Peter Small · Killer · Second Killer · Ross and Harlan · Ellen · Keith · Case Worker · Rabid Ron · Lydia · Katya · Hairdresser · McVicker's Family · Beavis' Imaginary Children · Butt-Head's Imaginary Children · Gus Baker · Leroy · Fire · Jesus Christ · Ganesha · Buddha · Zeus · Bill Gates · Bill (Steamroller) · Linda · Joan · Mall Girls · Elevator Chick · Joe Adler · Suspicious Chick · Maya Kanigher · Megan · Old Woman (Couch-Fishing) · Cop (Couch-Fishing) · Cop (Pipe of Doom) · Cop (Screamers) · Mechanic · Slob · Priest · Rabbi · Jasmine · Captain Dick Jackman · Charlie the Angel · Misty Lou · Lucas · Dennis · Female Judge · Screaming Guy · Black Female Cop · Corvair Owner · Jim Baxley · Snake Woman · Urologist · Dr. Fisk · Dr. Leibowitz · Vet Receptionist · Wrong Mr. Anderson · Crystal · Sapphire · Gary · Shawna · Suspicious Chick · Debra Shea · Trish Burbee · Tiffany the Rubber Band Lady · Max Graham · Veterinarian · Victoria's Dad · Ric Aaron Joseph · Receptionist (Pumping Iron)

Movie Characters: Muddy Grimes · Dallas Grimes · ATF Agent Bork · ATF Agent Flemming · FBI Agent Hurly · Old Woman · Motley Crue Roadies · Judge · Serena Ryan · Jim Hartson · Mattison · Empress Beavis · Emperor Butt-Head

Smart Characters: Smart Beavis · Smart Butt-Head · Smart Daria · Smart McVicker · Smart Buzzcut · Smart Van Driessen · Smart Todd · Smart Judge · Smart Mrs. Stevenson

Mentioned Characters: Shirley Beavis · Tom Anderson's Son · Tom Anderson's Father

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